Back To The Olden Days...

So it's taken me a good two days to even complete this post...it's been a daunting task.  It started with me trying to find Chris and I's marriage license so I could confirm our eligibility for insurance (I just gave up and paid 9 bucks to get a copy made) and ended with my scanning in and editing all of these photos.  I have four boxes under our bed...one for each of the kids mementos and one for Chris and I (which obviously hasn't been touched since we had kids...there aren't a lot of memories to fill it with that can't be put into the kids boxes!)  ANYWAY, as I was digging through Chris and I's box, I came across a bunch of pictures of when Ayris was a baby and a few of Asher and then I found a little ziploc of some pictures of myself...I found myself crying when I was looking through all the pictures of Ayris.  It was so much easier to be her mom then and that sounds bad, especially considering she's only 4 and we have many more years to go but she needed me then and she didn't have the attitude she does today...she wasn't constantly questioning me, nor did she know all the right buttons to push to drive me absolutely insane.  Like I said, it was easier, but that doesn't make me love her any less...I just found myself saddened by how quickly it went and scared by the fact that it doesn't seem to be slowing down.  She used to be a full blown baby...she didn't know how to walk or talk...she was just my beautiful little girl who would forever hold that most special place because she was my firstborn child.  Once I got to the pictures of myself as a little girl, I wondered if my own mother, when looking back on my baby pictures still felt that same pang of 29 years gone by...does it ever go away???  Then I was thinking of a list of things I wish I'd known before I had children...and all of that is what follows in pictures...

Apparently people were afraid to center pictures back in the day...these were originals and they're both veering towards the left. And yes, I know that's a super scary birth picture...I swear babies are coming out cuter these days! Or maybe it's just MY babies that are coming out cuter?? Doesn't it just look like I came out talking though?? "Look Mr. Photographer...first off, you're standing a little too far to the right, my picture is going to be off center, and second, what's up with these bright lights??? It's making it difficult to open my eyes and that is obviously my best feature at the present time!"

I kind of look like I should be in the sound of music wearing this getup below...




Good grief, could I get any cuter mom???  Thanks for passing down the good genes...and thanks for developing a better sense of style by the time I would have been old enough to be embarrassed by it =)


By the way, I'm pretty sure the kids big heads didn't come from me afterall...can you tell from looking at the picture on the right, what child of mine that is??

Look at how happy I was...uninhibited smile and all...

K, now starts the portion of what I wish I'd known before having kids...1)  To have relaxed more instead of trying to fit a million things in...when we went to Hawaii we had things planned for every second of our stay (including waking up at 3 a.m. one morning to go see a sunrise...who does that on vacation???) and now having three kids, you can bet if we went to Hawaii, we'd probably make zero plans and instead stay in the room sleeping 75% of the time while eating and laying on random beaches the other 25% of the time.  And along the same lines as relaxing...to enjoy the view...it was easy to take for granted the palm trees and the sprawling ocean since we could have moments of silence whenever we wanted but now...times of peace and quiet happen few and far between...

2)  That this was as thin as I was ever going to get...that I was in fact thin and not ridiculously fat like I thought I was (I was 5 months pregnant in the picture below)..

And about 7 months pregnant in these pictures--I weigh the same now as I did in these pictures and there is no baby on board =(

3)  That actually being pregnant was even more enjoyable than all of the times I dressed myself up to be pregnant (as pictured below...(first picture is real pregnant, second picture is dressed up pregnant) I can't count how many times I would shove blankets under my shirt to see myself with that little belly...even before I'd formed a thought in my head about wanting kids and how many, I loved the idea of being pregnant)



4)  That there was no reason to be scared upon finding out I was pregnant.  There is absolutely nothing on this earth that could compare to having a child...nothing.  We had just found out we were pregnant before this picture of RJ and I was taken...

5)  That as awesome as being a mother is, it also sucks major butt sometimes.  There's feelings of guilt for yelling too much that day, feelings of inadequacy, feelings of being overwhelmed and probably most of all on my part, feelings of being underappreciated (I know...they're only 4,2 and 3 months...not quite old enough to understand appreciating their mama...my fear though is that they never will realize all of what it takes and means to be a mother...except for maybe the girls...and even then, it'll take having their own children for it to fully come to fruition). 

6)  That these perfect little human beings that you birth with those big blue eyes, all of a sudden turn on you and start shouting crazy untrue things like "You're mean mommy!", "I love Grandma more!" and "Leave me alone!" but in reality, at the end of the day, you're the most important person to them and they don't really love grandma more.  I actually just realized this one today because when Ayris told me she loved Grandma Molly more than me, I told her she could go pack her bags and live with her then because I didn't want her to suffer through living here when she could easily go live with the one she loves more...probably not my most defining moment as a mom but AGAIN, it's that feeling of underappreciation rearing it's ugly head...accckkk!  Suffice it to say, Ayris did not want to move out...thank the good Lord himself because I'm not sure what my next move would have been had she asked for a plane ticket???  So the lesson learned here is that children can say mean and evil things BUT, as an adult with far more knowledge and the ability to alter perception, you can get your children back on track in no time =)

7) Siblings love to hate each other.  Seriously, I cannot wait to have 4-5 children and see the type of relationships they'll all develop with one another as they grow older together but man, they fight like cats and dogs at these ages...if they're not screaming, they're hitting, if they're not hitting, they're pushing, if they're not screaming, hitting or pushing, they're sleeping...and that's about as far as the daily routine goes...but by golly, when one of those children leaves the house to go somewhere else without the other, it's like their best friend has left.  They like the extra attention they get from Chris and I but the time is usually filled with "I miss Ayris" or "When is Asher coming home?"

The picture on the right is one of my all time favorites of Ayris and Asher together.

8)  Raising daughters is hard.  I don't remember wishing one way or the other for a boy or girl when we found out I was pregnant but once I found out it was a girl, I was super excited to buy all kinds of girl clothes and have girl talks and watch movies together, etc...MAN, I wasn't thinking about how that female psycho gene would actually be implanted into my very own child...seriously though...it's difficult...and no one ever told me that it happened so young...one would think that a girl could wait until she was at least a teenager to develop some attitude...it started at like 3 with Ayris.  But I'll say it again...she's in a rough spot...she's the firstborn, she's female and there are more expectations placed on her unfortunately...expectations I swore she'd never have...there's more mom guilt to add to my plate...

These were the pictures below that got me started with my trip down memory lane...look at how cute and full of life she is...you just don't realize how crazy difficult it is to be a parent before you become one...constantly trying to figure out how to be the best parent you can be and like the quote above...basically having your heart walking around outside your body at all times...I'm far more afraid of bad things happening now that I'm a mom...things that could potentially take my children away from me...



Look at how blonde she was!!  Now she's borderline turning into a brunette...All of my little blonde haired children are going to the dark side =(

Ayris will always be this little girl to me...spunky and so completely in tune with herself...she knows exactly what she wants and has a knack for putting together some of the most uniquely fashion forward outfits I've seen for a 4 year old.  She is my determined/strong willed little girl...just like her mama...which is probably why she knows exactly the right ways to get me going.


This is a picture that came out a few years ago that I found in my box too...I thought it portrayed motherhood quite well on more days than not...


and THIS is one of my alltime favorite emails/forwards: 

What Do You Do All Day

A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in
their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers
strewn all around the front yard.
The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and
there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even
bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded
against one wall.
In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the
family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.
In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was
spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled
on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand
was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of
clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that
something serious had happened.
He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the
bathroom door.
As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn
over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been
smeared over the mirror and walls.
As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed
in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked
how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened
here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you
come home from work and you ask me what in the world I do all day?'
'Yes,' was his incredulous reply.
She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.

THE END



Oh my goodness, this cracked me up too (I found it online when I was trying to find the above passage

Upon telling people we're stay-at-home moms, we SAHMs have all heard (or heard others thinking) the question, "But what do you do all day?" In an attempt to shut those people up -- I mean, explain -- I have created a cheat sheet for you to whip out the next time someone asks this question.

Note: Detractors may point out that the following figures add up to more than 100 percent. This is no accident. In addition to no pay, there is no vacation or weekend from this job, either. But the benefits .... ah, they last forever (just ask any accidental SAHM who's a former corporate achiever). Anyway, here's the time breakdown:

•Picking things up -- 25 percent
•Putting things away -- 20 percent
•Pleading with other people to pick things up and put them away -- 10 percent
•Taking kids to playgrounds, playdates, music class or other activity to prevent them from destroying house -- 10 percent
•Doing paperwork (school, doctor, daycare, etc.) -- 2 percent
•Wiping bottoms, washing hands or otherwise assisting in the bathroom activities of other people -- 4 percent
•Dressing and undressing other people -- 6 percent
•Teaching other people to dress and undress -- 4 percent
•Preparing food -- 10 percent
•Helping other people eat food -- 10 percent
•Cleaning up after food preparation and consumption -- 10 percent
•Doing laundry -- 90 percent
•Worrying about money -- 15 percent
•Picking up and dropping off other people -- 22 percent
•Getting gas (for car) -- 2 percent
•Getting gas (from eating hot dogs and mac & cheese) -- 1 percent
•Paying bills, clipping coupons, talking to various "service" people on the phone -- 6 percent
•RSVPing, shopping for, and going to birthday parties -- 13 percent
•Reading stories -- 15 percent
•Making up stories -- 12 percent
•Grocery shopping -- 50 percent
•Making lists for grocery shopping -- 45 percent
•Doing things for self (showering, eating, going to the bathroom) -- 4 percent
•Threatening others -- 2 percent
•Bribing others -- 3 percent
•Answering questions (i.e., "Do dinosaurs have birthdays? What color is bear poop? Do fairies wear helmets? When a skunk bites you, does he say sorry?") -- 24 percent
•Repairing household objects that husband can't or won't fix -- 2 percent
•Indulgently ordering unnecessary child gear and toys online -- 3 percent
•Feeling guilty about the fact that you don't work "outside the home" -- 7 percent

Hahahaha, Do fairies wear helmets, do dinosaurs have birthdays...if those questions alone don't excite you about becoming a parent, I don't know what will...honestly, it's things like that that make the million loads of laundry a week and ridiculous amounts of attitude worth it all...seeing how these little miracles that YOU yourself made learn and grow everyday...and that I, as a stay at home mom get to witness it...well again, there's not much else I'd rather be doing.  I feel so fortunate that I have the ability to stay at home with my three beautiful kids...so thank you to Chris for making that possible!

Alright, after the 100+ hours I put into this, I'm going to click publish post...I should be good now for a couple of weeks right??? =)

Load the Car with Angels...

So first off, was anyone else kept awake by that crazy storm we had last night?  I must've been up for about an hour...AND when I went outside this morning, I noticed that our glass patio table with the umbrella and all had been blown over onto it's side...that thing is not light.  And the lamest thing of all is that we've had this STUPID newspaper sitting on our roof since winter and wouldn't you know THAT didn't get blown off in the storm...pssshhh.
Anyway, as I was laying in bed listening to the crazy thunder go on and on, I decided to go online and 1) look if we were under some kind of weather advisory (we were but just thunderstorm...I wasn't going to get all hot and bothered unless it was a tornado advisory) and 2) I decided to check for any articles on the star tribune about this guy that was hit in Lakeville a few weeks back.  I never wrote about it then because I was a little emotional about the subject...I had taken the kids to the park (I didn't even want to go in the first place...I should have just stayed home!) and during the course of it, a car hit a man and his wife on their motorcycle...they flew through the air and landed on the pavement...the woman got up right away but after about 15 minutes, an HCMC helicopter landed on the road and airlifted the guy away.  I held back tears the whole way home (the helicopter landing 20 feet away from us really did me in) and scoured the Internet the next few days trying to find out if the man had survived.  A few days ago, I finally got my chance to find out when I was pulled over for turning right on red (I apparently didn't stop before turning...who knew you even had to stop???) and I asked to cop if he knew anything about it...he did and he informed me the guy had died.  Turns out he was only 40 and he died 3 hours after being airlifted to HCMC.  I HATE crap like this.  I do the whole "what if" thing...what if he'd just waited a few more minutes before leaving...or if he'd just stayed at home in the first place...what if the 17 year old who hit him had been paying attention??  And then, I upset myself further by thinking about that person waking up for the day putting on their socks and shoes, not knowing that 8 hours later they're going to be hit by a car and die...it makes me sick just typing it out.  DEATH + ME do not go together well...I obviously have some kind of issues.  Anyway, back to my point...as I was laying in bed last night thinking about God (anytime it thunderstorms, in my head it seems like God is mad, which is weird too I'm sure...I'm just all kinds of messed up people!  You have no idea...really) and the man who died...I was thinking about how I need to start saying a little prayer every single time I get into the car...and how I need to say it out loud and it needs to be the same exact prayer...and that I need to have the kids say it with me because 11 years from now when Ayris starts driving and 13 years from now when Asher starts driving, my hope is that it will be BURNED into their memory and they'll just automatically say it each time they get into their cars themselves (honestly, I'm still not at a point where I'm even going to allow them to drive ever...but I imagine it will happen at some point)...so today, I asked Ayris if she remembered when the accident happened at the park...yes she did...and I told her that the guy died and explained how dangerous riding/driving in cars can be and how I'd like to start saying a little prayer each time we get in the car and could she help me to remember...well she sure could...so then I asked her what we should say that would remind God to protect us and keep the angels with us in the car at all times...to which she said we should say "Load the Car with Angels" because we need a lot of angels so they can protect all of us in the car.  I'm already envisioning us standing in the Target parking lot holding the door open for this line of angels that need to get in the car...while people wonder why the door is open and we're waving our angels into the car...our invisible angels. 

One of the things I often wonder about is if prayer can make a difference in the outcome of our deaths.  If everything is already set in stone with our birth and death, then can praying a prayer of safety for myself and my children alter the course of an accident that could have been had?  Or is it merely something that will give me piece of mind each time I get into the car?  I guess for now, I'm just going to have faith that my family will live long and healthy lives.

That's all for now...I have pictures to edit and then I'll get another post up =) 

Finally Got Some Editing Done...

Alright, here's some random pictures from the last couple of weeks...



Ayris just got a big girl bike a couple of weeks ago so this is her first time trying it out while Asher rides on her old trike (Asher has a spiderman bike waiting in the wings himself...he just doesn't know it yet...until his birthday)



Ayris being her Ramona Quimby self and it FINALLY happening...Adler fell asleep in the jumper!





Another one of those shots where one boy is in focus and the other isn't and then the reverse of the initial picture...





Don't they just look like they're ready to start a family?? =) This is Susie and boy don't I wish she lived in MN...like right next door. Seriously. The girl must've held Adler for half of the day and didn't even give him up when he got fussy...she was a pro...



And, she even got him smiling...









Adler has just recently gotten into watching t.v. Anytime it's on, he'll turn his head towards it and watch it...AND, I finally got the Bebe Pod so Adler can start sitting up on his own...he's never been a fan of laying on his back...he'd rather be in the know...we had a Bumbo with Ayris and ended up taking it back because her legs were so chubby that she would get stuck in it...I read online that the Bebe pod worked better for kids with chubby legs...even though Adler isn't super chubby yet...we're only in month three =)



And this picture is for my friend T...she kept calling me a Cullen because of the perfection that is my chalk white skin...well, I just wanted her to know that we are raising baby Cullen's here in the Collins household as proven by this picture of Adler's legs that Ayris took...



That's all the pictures I have for now. I wish I'd taken a picture of my friend Michelle's super cute baby Charlie...I was convinced that Adler was growing at a slow pace because he still seemed like such a little tiny baby to me...yeah, he's totally not...compared to Charlie, he's like a super ginormo chunk-a-monk!

We're Getting Big...

So I've mentioned numerous times that sometimes I just don't feel like an adult...a parent, etc...because I still feel like the same person that I was in highschool...but when I see things like this:


I'm like WHOA! How'd that happen? How cool is that...look at all those little names listed...and they're ALL MINE. Like I made them and they're super cute and perfect, and wouldn't you know, there's three of them now...like three little people carrying around half of my DNA everywhere they go. And the idea of it is just crazy and exciting at the same time. Sometimes it's easy to lose sight of what a miracle it is to have these three tiny people...especially when they're acting all insane during the day and I'm pretty sure I'm losing my mind on a daily basis (for example, I went to Rainbow yesterday and realized once I got home that they only entered in 4 of my double coupons instead of 5...well hello, I was going back to get my 2 bucks...as I walk in, the cashier who rung me up noticed me and was like "Oh, your corn and green beans are on the counter over there"...dude, I left some of my groceries too?  I wasn't even coming back for those! Not only that but I'm pretty sure it would have taken me a week to realize it since it took me about a week to start questioning where my tomatoes were that I had bought from Walmart the week before...I was asking Chris if he had eaten all three of them...he said no...so then I'm questioning in my head if Ayris put them back in the store before we left but I was pretty sure I had bought them...yeah, I found the moldy remnants yesterday in the laundry room in a bag that had all of Asher's birthday supplies...SERIOUSLY! I cannot keep it together lately! I might actually have to put Ayris in charge once the 4th comes along because I'm not sure that I'm going to be altogether with it when there are that many people to take care of and keep track of! LUCKILY, my issues haven't extended much past the loss of food...I guess I won't start to REALLY worry unless I leave a child behind at Rainbow and even fail to realize it until I go back to retrieve some coupon owed money!) ANYWAY, what was I saying...oh yeah, so it's things like this little thing I got in the mail or pulling out my insurance card where all the kids names are listed that I stop in that one second and just marvel at the three little blessings I have in my life. It's pretty amazing. As for that picture above...it's talking about being removed from coverage by July 31st if we don't turn in our marriage certificate, and all three kids birth certificates. First off, we just received this stupid thing in the mail a couple of days ago...so if you do the math...that would have been August already...SECOND off, where in the world is our marriage certificate??? Heck if I know...guess I should be finding that before deciding to have baby number 4 though...the good lord knows I wasn't too thrilled about the hefty price tag of Adler WITH insurance...I'd hate to see our bill if I wasn't covered to begin with...I'm thinking we'd be freebirthing if that were the case! (Just so you know, I'd pay anything for my kid but for whatever reason, the cost of having a kid is going up ALOT between each child...pretty sure Ayris cost us a whopping $600...Asher came in around $1200 and Adler is now around $2500...good grief...just writing that out made me realize they keep doubling! I've never noticed that before...I think I need to stick with my plan of having them back to back...if I wait much longer, it's gonna be quadrupled or more!

K, back on track, here was the last picture I was going to throw up (I still have a TON of editing and a bunch of random pictures to post...I'll get to it!)...


How cool is that to see us all lined up on a bench!? This was at a friend's wedding so I figured while we all looked good (and by we, I mean me...because since quitting my job, I don't put a lot of effort into getting ready anymore =) I'd get a picture taken...one or two more kids and we won't fit on that bench!

P.S.  Where'd you go Huron, South Dakota?  I miss you.  Secondly, whose in Corning, New York?  Or Oklahoma City, Oklahoma??  Or Sioux City, South Dakota??  This ticker is driving me nuts because I see these places and I'm SO curious to who is there!  So message me people and let me know because the curiousity is literally driving me crazy!  I may have to take that ticker off!  You can let me know at michellecollins410@yahoo.com

Huron, South Dakota...I Have Just Written Another Post!

So last night I added a little ticker at the bottom of my blog that just shows a live feed (looks like it cuts off about 11 hours back) because I've been finding out that people I didn't even realize read my blog...actually read my blog...I can already see this is going to be addicting because I woke up this a.m. to see if anyone had read it...and wouldn't you know...already 5 people had accessed this little thing in the 10 hours I was asleep!  Yea for having this little ticker that will hopefully keep me more accountable in writing and posting.  Part of the problem has been the pictures...it's easy as pie to just write some words and throw them up but honestly, I figure most people come here to see the pictures of the kids and now that putting up pictures is a 4-step process that takes a BUTT LOAD of time, I've been overwhelmed at the thought of even starting posts...but I could also be like other bloggers and just do a picture here and there...my problem is that I can never pick just one =(  But back to the ticker...because this made me laugh...whoever is in Huron, South Dakota (Tammy is that you???  Or Cecily??? (Aberdeen was on there too so I'm assuming that's you Cecily?) anyway, the wonderful person from Huron, South Dakota checked the blog 11 hours and 16 minutes ago, 10 hours and 21 minutes ago, and 48 minutes ago =)  My appreciation goes out to that person for being such a sweet blog stalker but I'm thinking your expectations might be a smidge high as I never foresee myself posting 3 times in that amount of time =)  None the less, thank you Huron for going to my blog page as much as you do =)

On another note, last night, no sooner than I got off here talking about my lack of memory, I go upstairs and realize the toilet is clogged...which is always super cool because you never know what's been shoved down there and how long it's going to take to get it out...anyway, Ayris asks if she can have some of those little pink pads underneath the sink (you know those carefree ones that I honestly think serve no purpose because they are no bigger than like a penny??)...so I told her if she'd run down and get me the plunger from the downstairs bathroom, I'd get her some pads...OK, that was a great deal she thought.  When she returned 20 seconds later, I had started getting Adler's bedtime essentials ready (formula, bottle, diaper, pacifier, etc) and she runs up all excited...hands me the plunger and was like..."Mom, where are my pads??  Did you forget about them?"...Oh yeah, sorry, I did...."Mom, I wasn't even gone that long!"....

I'm telling ya...it's bad people...and I'm only 29.

Another super cool thing...or two...when I woke up this morning, Adler was already awake just content to be on his own....yea for babies who don't wake their moms up with crying...AND when I was in the kitchen making some breakfast, Ayris walks in and says, "Mom, do you know why I love you so much?" and I said, no, why???  And she said "Because you take care of me all of the time, that's why!"  Well I'll be...I am BURNING that little tidbit into my mind...I'm going to repeat it to myself all day today so it's not one of those things that get lost in my short term memory...because we all know, that was probably my one chance of hearing those words coming from her mouth...and now this blog is proof that she said it...I will be marking this day down so I can remind her to go back and read this post 10 years from now!

AND lastly, I just want everyone to know that I am about to go be a rockstar mom...which does not happen all that often...I am going to take all THREE kids to the movie theater to see that Marmaduke movie.  Just know that I didn't even take Ayris or Asher to the movies for the longest time...the grandparents would take them but I never had the balls to do it...and now, *gasp*, I'm going to attempt my very first solo trip with all three...I'll tell you...I'm feeling pretty good about myself right now and my abilities.  Of course, this could all change once we actually get there...we'll see what happens!  (BTW, Grandma Sooner, Ayris just typed you an email on her Thomas the Train computer asking if you'd go to the movie with us...obviously you'll never get that email but I thought I'd let you know she was thinking of you...I told her you were working though...boo for working =(

*Would you believe that the word butt load was actually loaded into spell check?  I had spelled it "buttload" and apparently, it has to be two separate words to be legit...the fact that buttload is actually even in the spell checker is what gets me...

AccccKKK!

I know...I'm lame...I have about a bajillion pictures to sort through and edit before I can even start to think about posting them on the blog...and I went on a vacation, and then I went on another vacation...scratch that...my children came with so the second one was NOT a vacation but it was fun...none the less, those two trips added to my already ridiculous lack of time to work on this blog that, no doubt millions of people read...(actually, even if no one read it, I still LOVE having this blog because I have absolute faith in the fact that what happens today will have been forgotten in about 2.5 days time, given the ridiculous condition of my prefrontal cortex since having babies...Ok...quick interjection (is this a word?  It sounds weird), this just made me laugh out loud...so I google, "what part of the brain stores long term memory and short term memory", because OBVIOUSLY if I can't remember what I did 2.5 days ago, remembering particular pieces information that I learned 10+ years ago is probably not going to be anything I could rely on with certainty...anyway, so I land on an article that tells me this:  "Unless an individual pays attention for about eight uninterrupted seconds to encode the stimulus into short-term memory, it will be lost"...when I've said I'm getting dumber by the kid, I was right...when in the world do I have 8 uninterrupted seconds during the day now having three children?   I'm making it sound as though I am with my children 24/7 (I pretty much am) and that they are by my side 24/7 (at least one of them usually always is) and that in turn means that I am paying attention to at least one of them every 8 seconds...THIS would not be true...I for sure do not pay attention to them every 8 seconds but does that mean that one of them is not talking every 8 seconds?  NO...that just means that I tend to tune them out more often than not =)  So seriously, even when I'm writing on the blog and trying hard to pretend I don't hear Ayris screaming at Asher to get his penis off her face (true story...she's yelling this one day and I run upstairs...okay, I finish what I'm doing and 5 minutes later, I decide to go upstairs...turns out, they were wrestle fighting and Asher was naked (because he usually ends up naked after a few trips to the bathroom during the day...we lose at least an article or two of clothing each trip) and when Asher pinned her down, his man parts just happened to touch her cheek...she was obviously grossed out), and letting Adler cry for just 30 more seconds while I complete a sentence, I do consider that to be interrupted stimuli...so it's no wonder I can't remember squat...I have constant NOISE in general about 14 hours of every single day.  It's a good thing Long Term memory works in a completely different way, or my kids would be teaching me how to eat and tie my shoes...EVERY SINGLE DAY...I say every single day because remember, I have no short term memory either...that could actually be pretty awesome.)

How's that for the world's longest thought using the most amount of ( and )'s in a paragraph.  Anyway, I've spent the past 2 hours reading other people's blogs instead of working on my own...and now I'm tired and ready for bed...*hopefully* some day soon I will post some pictures of my oh-so-gorgeous children all the while coming up with something way more interesting to write about (although that part about short term memory was pretty informational huh?  And interesting...)...BUT, I've noticed on some of the other blogs I read, that they have people ask them questions about their blog, their life, their kids, their views/opinions, etc and THAT sounds like fun so if all 5 of you reading this were to ask a question, I might actually have something to write about once in a while =)  Anyway, it's time to stop neglecting the kids...and by that, I mean, it's time to put them to bed...I kid, I kid...sorta...I'll spend a good 30 minutes laying with them until they fall asleep because I'm such a sucker that I can't just put them to bed awake...even though that's what I'd really like to do tonight...and every night that follows =(  Actually, I take that back...laying with them at night right before they fall asleep is usually my favorite part of the day =)

One last thing...Asher just shoves a gobstopper in my mouth just now and says "Mommy, it's yummy"...I think what he MEANT to say was "Mommy, it WAS yummy...before I held it in my hand for 30 minutes, therefore removing the tasty coating and replacing it with a sweaty-hand-induced ball of salt", but it's the thought that counts right?!?

Finally a Picture of THE Baby Bird...

So my friend Diane just sent me a few pictures from when Adler and I had stopped to visit a few weeks ago...and now I finally have a picture of my little man making his little baby bird mouth...in the second picture, it looks like he's thinking "Maybe YOU are my mommy...if so, can you go find something to stick in my mouth???"



More of the little bird man...


And here's a cute one of Asher...he cracks me up...he came running up to me this morning wearing nothing but these little sunglasses around his waist...


I'm also going to post some videos below so those of you that get email updates, you'll have to go to the actual web page to view them...and you'll probably want to pause the music player at the bottom of my page so you can hear them...the first video is of me trying to get smiles out of Adler, followed up by him sorta doing his baby bird mouth...the second video is of Adler doing the weird baby sleep thing where their eyes are going crazy even though they aren't really awake...and in the last video, I recorded Asher singing his favorite song (one that Chris started singing to the kids when they were little) while we were in the hospital...while Chris was out of town and Asher was sick, he must've sung that song a million times during the day...sometimes even in his sleep...

Baby Birds' 2 Month Stats...

First, I should show you what a difference two months makes...not only did those scrawny little legs fill themselves in but Adler managed to go from a tan little dude to a pasty white one like his mama!  These are the exact same organic gerber onsies...I had just put the iron-on transfer on the first one...even though the leg holes look considerably bigger in the first pic...


I was convinced for the first month or so that he wasn't even growing but this picture is proof that he has, in fact, put on some chunk. Here's another set with a close of up those lovable little thighs!


Below is Adler's...actually, all of the kids doctor. Thankfully I have been able to have Dr. O'Neil deliver ALL of my kids so far...here's hoping she'll be around for the rest! =) And you can't really see it on the scale but Adler weighed in at 12 pounds, 11 ounces. The FIRST child I've have ever had that hasn't been tipping the scale in the 100th percentile for weight at their checkup =) Ayris and Asher were always in the 100th percentile for everything at every appointment...head, height and weight. Adler is right there with them in length...he's at 100 percent (he is now 2 feet long, which is exactly what Asher was at his 2 month checkup...Adler just weighs about 3 pounds less than Asher did right now)...but his head is a little smaller (at 15.5 inches). SO...maybe we have our little track runner...or basketball player in th family now?? Of course, I'd be fine if he just played piano with those long baby fingers of his! No expectations though...he can do whatever he wants in life...except for play hockey...go skiing, ride motorcycles, go sky diving or bungee jumping...I'm sure there is more I will add to the list as we go.


Aww...this kids hair just kills me...I can't tell you how much I just play with that little sprout of hair (I was going to try to give him the nickname sprout because I thought it was cute and appropro BUT baby bird seems to be sticking a bit more...I just LOVE it when he does his little baby bird mouth...although he's doing it less and less now =(...anyway, I'm surprised he still has that sprout of hair for as much attention as it gets...


Doesn't it just look like he's in a trance with whatever awesome thing I'm whispering to him? The second one kind of looks like he wants me to let him out of my death grip and to stop kissing him but whatever...I'm sure he'll have that look 8 years from now when I'm doing the same thing in front of his friends!



Man, don't you just want to eat him up with these smiles?? They are my favorite...now is the stage where you act like a pure idiot just to get one of these out of him...


The only problem is that I can't make him smile and take a picture at the same time...as soon as I put that big ol' camera in front of my face, the smile disappears...apparently cameras aren't worthy of smiles yet...just people. My mom was holding him in the picture above and I had Ayris take the shot below where I got him to smile...


And the below picture...can you even believe these are all mine? How in the world have we managed to have three kids in 4.5 years? And then I wonder how in the world I'll have time to have another one or two. As it was, when Asher was going through everything a couple weeks ago, I almost forgot Adler in the X-ray room until the lady asked me if I wanted my purse and my baby!?! Oh yeah...that'd be good! Hello!!! There have been a couple of times where I've plum forgotten about Adler until he wakes up crying...and then it's was like...oh yeah, I have another kid...that probably hasn't happened in the past few weeks but Adler slept so much and has always been so quiet that it's easy to forget there's a whole other person in the house. That sounds bad...but really, it's just proof of the perfection that is Adler...there is a blogger who just had her 7th baby and I love reading about her kids...trips to the store with that many kids...I can't even imagine...I'd have to be counting heads at that point...and I can't even imagine trying to keep 7 "A" names straight!


Okay, I had to throw this one in there...I was going through all of the photobucket options for things to do with your pictures and stumbled across this one called sketch...I am not even kidding, I don't think I'd be having any more kids if they came out looking like this...Ayris looks the least messed up...Asher a little moreso than Ayris...like he's got some crazy in the eyes and poor Adler looks like some kind of cannibal alien (that or a PUG dog baby) whose ready to eat someone...which is probably why the other two alien kids aren't sitting by him!  Seriously, who would even use this tool?  I can't say it improves the outcome of any picture!

Asher Comes Home...

I neglected to mention why Asher was in the hospital in the last post and a few of you were asking about it...we went into the clinic last Wednesday because Asher had had a fever all night...that morning it was 105.6...he had no other symptoms so they sent us home and told us to just pushing tylenol and motrin...after an additional two days of going back to the clinic, they gave Asher a shot in his leg muscle (because an ultrasound showed one of his kidneys was enlarged) and told us to come back if he hadn't improved by Saturday...we came back and they admitted us to the hospital because they assumed it was a kidney infection but they weren't going to know what to "treat" until Tuesday when his urine test results came back (they could do initial tests but had to send them off to somewhere special for something more detailed)...needless to say, he was able to come home on Tuesday after he had been fever free for 24 hours and was able to get an RX that he can now be on for the next 10 days...at the end of which, we will be scheduling an appt at Children's to have a test done to see if urine is leaking back into his kidneys...if so, he'll be on antibiotics for the next year...if not...well then they have no idea what caused the infection in the first place. As of now he's pretty much back to normal aside from his appetite...that's a little slow going.

Here are a few pictures from before the hospital visit, during and after. Sorry...Adler was a little neglected...there will be more pictures of him on the next post I'm sure =) We'll start with him though to get us going...

I love these pictures for many reasons...first, I love his little mohawk and how well it's displayed here...second, I love how when I turn his bib around it looks like a little baby cape...how long do you think I can get him to wear a "cape" that says "Mommy Loves Me"?, and lastly, I love how in the second picture, it looks like he's totally involved in girl gossip "Oh my goodness girl, your mom is making you cry it out at night??!!?...my mama better NEVER or there's gonna be some fussin' goin on!"




Okay, so maybe there were more of Adler than I thought...

I love, love, love my jumparoos!  I've had one through the kids...the first one I bought lasted through Ayris and Asher so I thought it was time to get a new one for the next two kids...it never fails that every child passes out in this thing...which is a GOOD thing.






















I am SO thankful that Asher is out of the hospital and it was something that is now being fixed...I don't know how moms/families out there deal with anything more...it's so nice having his fun loving, supercute, happy personality back at home.  I just think Asher looks crazy grown up in this picture below.  I'm losing my baby to a little boy =(

It's Been Hard Day's Night...I Should Be Sleeping Like A Log...

But I'm not...it is 2:51 a.m. and I have decided that sleep is not in the cards for me at this point so I figured I'd post a little update about Asher...who is currently watching Astro Boy...he's not going to want to leave this place now that he knows he can watch movies in the wee hours of the morning (cool stuff like that would never happen at home!) 

This was my little angel baby pretty much late Tuesday afternoon through Friday night until today when they finally decided that admitting him to the hospital was the best course of action:



And now he looks like this:


Which to me, screams "Really, that thing (i.e. the camera) follows us to the hospital too??"...well of course it does buddy...this is the best mama can do to chronicle your life since we both know your baby book is going to be a complete disappointment to you in the future (thank you babycenter for allowing me to look up the appropriate milestones for a baby ages 1 month and up because I'm pretty sure I never made it past the first few weeks of any of my childrens lives in their respective books)...and of course the second picture above...well, that's him accepting his mother's neuroticism all while plastering that infamous smile on his face.

Things have been pretty much the same here as at home...he doesn't want to eat and he goes back and forth between feeling pretty decent while watching cartoons and coloring, to wanting nothing more than to sleep when his fever creeps back up.  He is NOT happy with the iv site and the board that he has to wear to keep his arm straight.  Normally they like to have the iv site in their hand but after about 40 minutes of insane screaming, pulled lines, headbutting and an overall traumatic experience for all involved, they decided to put it in the crook of his arm. 

Asher is cracking me up right now...he just sat up all happy and said "I found my sicky cup"...he knows how to say sippy cup and has since he learned what one was...but I find his new term appropriate for the time being.

Asher has pretty much been a trooper though...even when he's feeling his worst, he still is very polite and will say "Thanks" for whatever it is you're doing for him...be it rubbing his head or giving him his milk...I on the other hand am handing in my trooper hat when it comes to this thing they call a bed for guests...I have no doubt in my mind that Chris heaved a small sigh of relief when I pretty much forced him to go home and let me stay the night with Asher...because he's had 4 nights of experience on that chair/bed when both Ayris and Asher were born...I, on the other hand always though the hospital bed wasn't that comfortable so really...the chairbed couldn't be that much worse right?  Well I was wrong...I'm pretty sure prison beds are more comfy...and by golly, it makes the bed Asher has feel like I'm sleeping on a cloud...I must admit, for a split second, I wondered how bad it would be if I just swapped beds with the kid...but lucky for him, a mother's love won out...unfortunately for Chris...tomorrow, a father's love is going to win out...I'm just sayin...=)

Little sidenote...I've just heard the song they play when a new baby is born for the 3rd time...so in the past 17 hours, 3 new little babies have been born.  It kind of sucks because its a huge reminder of my other baby boy at home but on the flip side, it's new life and what's not to be happy about that.  I didn't realize they played the music all over the hospital, which just makes me happy...don't you wish we could celebrate life like that always?  Having music stream down from the heavens each time a baby was born?  Obviously that's probably not realistic...the music would never stop but for now, it's a nice little reminder while we're here.  Which reminds me...and this just made me sick to my stomach...there was this little 2 month baby girl screaming outside Asher's room around 11 p.m....turns out, she has a high fever and her mom had to leave to go tuck her other kid in at home...after like an hour of the little girls crying, it was killing me not to run out there and try to console her myself...I made a comment to the nurse about how I wouldn't be able to leave my baby if they were in that condition and she said that there are tons of parents who bring their kids to Peds and leave them alone in the hospital for their entire stay...the nurses end up having to call them and say, "Ok, you can come pick up your kid now"...she also said that a friend of hers in another state that works at a hospital told her that there are parents who know that all they have to do is say that their child has a fever and they have to be admitted to the hosiptal for 48 hours before they can be released so these parents will call in on a Friday night or Holiday weekend...drop their kid off for two days and then come back and get them when they call.  Can you even imagine a parent like that?  That makes me sick to think there are children around the world sitting in hospital rooms all by themselves because their parents should have never been parents in the first place.  It's just not right.  The nurse did say that their are parents that just don't have the help who need to go home when they have other kids and no other resources but she also said those are the parents who are calling 10 times to check in on the kid that is in the hospital.  I can't imagine not having the ability to have at least one parent...Chris or myself at the hospital at all times with Asher.  So for that, I am SO thankful to all of the grandparents who are helping out and doling out love to Ayris and Adler.  But I'm still sick about all of the other kids out there...this is another one of those "I could NEVER be God" moments...I don't know how he can handle seeing all the bad crap like this in the world.  I have decided that in these cases, ignorance is bliss...I don't like knowing that baby birds fall out of trees and die when people like Ayris doesn't find them and get them back in the nest...just like I now hate knowing that there are some really suckass parents in the world...I prefer not to have proof of these depressing things...

On another sidenote and to get off that subject, I am gaining weight during my stay...I can just feel the fat accumulating.  I was super excited to find out that I could order off of Asher's menu as long as I paid for my meal with a credit card...seriously, if you're in the mood for the best pizza ever...this hospital has it.  I told Chris that I might just be the first person in history to start ordering out from the local hospital on random nights when trying to figure out what's for dinner (Yeah, honey, can you just swing by Fairview on your way home from work and pick up some pizza?)...you think I'm kidding...I am so not.  The pizza is that good.

Okay, this has taken me a good hour to write already in between switching out movies, getting milk, having Asher pee in a portable urinal (seriously, boys get ALL the perks!), trying to scoop out really big boogers that my naked eye is unable to see but that Asher INSISTS is there and administering more motrin...I honestly thought I'd be getting good sleep tonight!  But Asher is tired so I'll end for now...I'll leave you with some things Ayris has said lately that I had jotted down on the blog earlier in the week before things got so crazy.

(As she was trying to find my heartbeat on my chest)  Mom...I think your heart is taking a nap right now because it's not beating.  (LUCKILY, I am not really a vampire or dead at all...she just wasn't listening in the right place!)

Ayris:  Mom, why did you put that swimsuit on to go outside?
Me:  So I could get a bit more color than this pasty white I'm currently sporting.
Ayris:  More color?
Me:  Yeah, a tan.
Ayris:  What's a tan?
Me:  Where your skin gets a little darker than it normally is.
Ayris.  Oh, I don't want your skin darker...I want it to stay all blonde.

AND, my favorite...as we were on our way to pick up Chris from the airport, Ayris just randomly says "I can't wait to be a mommy so I can take a vacation anytime I want!"

At which point, I was confused about what "mommy" she's been hanging around...because last I checked, this mommy hadn't had a vacation in a while.

I did prod a little more into her very confused mind (mommies taking vacations???  It's unheard of!) and asked why she thought she'd be able to take a vacation anytime she wanted when she had kids...because what would she do with the kids?  "Well bring them with...DUH MOM" (as a side note, this child has starting saying DUH and WHATEVER MOM...I'm NOT digging that...last night she called something "Lame" and I was like, where you'd learn that?  And she goes "I heard it from you mom, DUH"...I will admit to probably using the word lame (after all, it's not a bad word, it just sounded funny coming from HER) but pretty sure I left the words DUH and WHATEVER back in my junior high days...and I would have been fine living out the rest of my life never being on the receiving end of hearing them again...Bleh...do words make a comeback like clothes do or have they just never gone out of style to begin with?  Like being past down from generation to generation...??? 

Back to bringing the kids with...OBVIOUSLY the child and I have very different ideas of what a vacation is...My idea: Bringing the kids with = EVERYDAY LIFE/INSANITY...she isn't old enough to realize that it's not a vacation if the kids come with!  At least not when they are this little...I do find myself wanting them to be just a few years older though so we could go to the Atlantis Resort/other various family vacation spots...I was already telling Chris that this time next year might just be a fine time to do that...at least with Ayris and Asher anyway.

Ok, enough for tonight, after one last picture of Asher...as hard as the poor kid tries to be happy and upbeat, you can just see the "sick" in his eyes: